On My Knees: A Memoir - Paperback

by Periel Aschenbrand (Author)

On My Knees is Periel Aschenbrand's seriously funny follow-up to her debut memoir The Only Bush I Trust Is My Own.

At the beginning of On My Knees, we find Periel chain-smoking her days away on a plastic-covered couch, watching reruns of Law & Order while she squats in her deceased grandmother's apartment and adjusts to being alone for the first time in a decade. So begins a Dante-esque journey through the many rings of single-girl hell that includes crazy one-night stands; an unhealthy attachment to a dental hygienist; a run-in with Philip Roth; and, in the end, a trip to Israel and an encounter with a man who just might be the one.

Hysterical and heartfelt, On My Knees traces Periel's riotous attempt to rebuild her life, her relationships, and her trademark confidence.

Rebuilding a life from scratch is never pretty, but it's always memorable:

• Candid Humor: From a possibly murderous dental hygienist to a mortifying encounter with Philip Roth over a bowl of cherries, Periel Aschenbrand holds nothing back.
• Single Life in the City: Witness the horrors of modern dating, including one-night stands so terrible they circle back to hilarious, all from a plastic-covered couch in a dead grandmother's apartment.
• Jewish Humor: A sharp, witty, and unapologetically neurotic voice that feels like talking to your funniest friend after three glasses of wine.
• Finding Love Unexpectedly: A search for self that begins in single-girl hell takes a sharp turn in Israel, proving that the best things happen when you least expect them.

Front Jacket

A brash, bawdy, and downright ballsy ode to the ups and downs of life and love, On My Knees opens with Periel Aschenbrand--still reeling from a breakup with her longtime boyfriend--chain-smoking her days away on a plastic-covered couch and watching reruns of Law and Order while she squats in her dead grandmother's apartment in the East Village.

Armed with her wicked wit and a motley cast of characters that includes her hovering Jewish mother, an eccentric uncle, and her neurotic best friend/wingwoman, Aschenbrand embarks on a Dante-esque journey through the many rings of single-girl hell involving crazy one-night stands; an unhealthy attachment to a dental hygienist; a run-in with Philip Roth; and, in the end, a trip to Israel and an encounter with the man who just might be the one. Hysterical and heartfelt, On My Knees traces Periel's attempt to rebuild her life, her relationships, and her trademark confidence in a story so riotous it would make Chelsea Handler blush.

Back Jacket

A brash, bawdy, and downright ballsy ode to the ups and downs of life and love, On My Knees opens with Periel Aschenbrand--still reeling from a breakup with her longtime boyfriend--chain-smoking her days away on a plastic-covered couch and watching reruns of Law and Order while she squats in her dead grandmother's apartment in the East Village.

Armed with her wicked wit and a motley cast of characters that includes her hovering Jewish mother, an eccentric uncle, and her neurotic best friend/wingwoman, Aschenbrand embarks on a Dante-esque journey through the many rings of single-girl hell involving crazy one-night stands; an unhealthy attachment to a dental hygienist; a run-in with Philip Roth; and, in the end, a trip to Israel and an encounter with the man who just might be the one. Hysterical and heartfelt, On My Knees traces Periel's attempt to rebuild her life, her relationships, and her trademark confidence in a story so riotous it would make Chelsea Handler blush.